Cons

Twoflower comes to stay, Rincewind runs away,
Homicidal luggage and Ankh-Morpork burns.
Zoon traders can’t lie, Esk learns magic on the sly,
Death takes an apprentice and Mort’s lifetimer turns.
Spelter and Carding plot, Half-brick in a sock,
Try to make a tortoise run, and the pharoahs raise the sun.
Change the play’s murder scene, Lancre’s got a new king,
Guards! Guards! dragons fight, Eric’s demonology.

We didn’t start the turtle,
It was always swimming since the Disc was spinning.
We didn’t start the turtle,
No, we didn’t write it but we idolise it.

Ancient Leshp is waterlogged, Gaspode the Wonder Dog
Snow globes, fields of corn, Fresh Start Club
Magic Kindom far away, Chelonian Mobilé
Mica, Beryl, Shale, Nanny’s bathtub
Crop circles, bees swarm, Edward’s rampage with a gonne
Dead Punch and Judy man, Imp y Celyn and the Band
Lord Hong’s clothes chest, Red Army, unrest
Joy of Snackes, Opera Ghost, Walter Plinge’s roses

We didn’t start the turtle,
It was always swimming since the Disc was spinning.
We didn’t start the turtle,
No, we didn’t write it but we idolise it.

Golem king, clay feet, arsenic candles, Cockbill Street
Hogfather, ho ho ho, blood on midwinter snow
Captain Jenkins, sea squall, Battlefield football
Bugarup Mardi-Gras, Rincewind the Archchancellor.

Carrot and Angua, Space Ape, Breccia
Lettice Earwig, gold cup, Granny messes minds up
Igor’s dog Scraps, Brother Oats’s holy axe,
Balls of rock in motion, Blobs in the oceans

We didn’t start the turtle,
It was always swimming since the Disc was spinning.
We didn’t start the turtle,
No, we didn’t write it but we idolise it.

Low King, Dr’zka, Sybil sings an opera
New Firm, William, and Dog Bites Man
Deja fu, Auditors, saga of the Silver Horde
Spider, rat pipe, Maurice gives an extra life
Magic symbols, special robes, Elves and wizards at the Globe,
Lilac, 25th of May, what else do I have to say?

We didn’t start the turtle,
It was always swimming since the Disc was spinning.
We didn’t start the turtle,
No, we didn’t write it but we idolise it.

Tiffany, Wee Free Men, Roland Chuffley’s back again,
Hiver at the Witch Trials, chocolate nougat missiles
War in Borogravia, Stanley’s acuphillia,
Giant chicken, Mister Shine, Reading “Where’s My Cow?” on time
Rescue Summer, Winter dies, Mister Bent with battle pies
Glenda’s kindness, Brazeneck, Nutt, Trev and Juliet
Goblin slaves on foreign shores, Leap knave, jump whore,
Geoffrey’s shed with poo galore, Still the fans all scream for more

We didn’t start the turtle,
It was always swimming since the Disc was spinning
We didn’t start the turtle,
But when we are gone, it will still swim on and on and on…